Starsong (starsongky) wrote,

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Feeling blue?

blue aura
Your aura shines Blue!

What Color Is Your Aura?
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Odd, I've been told by those who can see such things that my aura's actually a forest green, so that's how I tend to think of it.

Yesterday's Change card - I need to change *something* all right. I'm way overweight - 319 lbs. when I checked a couple of days ago, and I'm barely 5' tall. Probably double where I should be. I gotta figure out some way to get a mental handle on losing weight, get connected with my body instead of always thinking of "me" and "it" as two separate things. Not sure how yet, but I need to do something. Every time I think of dieting I cringe. Spent way too many times hungry as a kid, simply because we were poor - not dirt-poor, but barely scraping by - so the idea of going hungry on purpose is really alien to me.

Tonight's card, from the Nigel Jackson Rune Card deck - Gyfu, the Gift - this one's shaped like an X. Gebu is another name for it, I think, still learning what they're called. Refers both to giving and receiving gifts, realizing that life and nature can be gifts as well. The best gifts usually don't have a price tag - love, compassion, help form another. I can try to see losing weight as a gift to myself, less holding me down could mean more energy, and in the long run more time as well. X marks the spot, I guess.

I haven't eaten much today, just some beets this afternoon (yes, I like them) so I shouldn't feel too guilty about scarfing down a couple of cheap hot dogs to get energy for work. I can take the stairs today instead of catching the service elevator out of habit. Not much, but it's a start.

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