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Star Songs


March 26th, 2009

stressed @ 12:19 pm

Current Mood: stressed stressed

Stopped by the cafeteria at work to grab some soup for lunch (today's cream of tomato), noticed a couple of folks from Banquets in there setting up for a function. Apparently we've got an employee awards thing at 2pm today that nobody told me about. Paycheck pickup's normally not until 4pm, except when they do the awards things. So I stopped by HR to verify the early deadline, and kinda lost it emotionally. I tend to express frustration with tears, always have as long as I can remember. HR Guy locked his office door to let me vent, gave me a buisness card for a free counseling service that's part of our medical benefits. There've been a lot of changes at work lately and I really don't cope with change very well. Reminds me of some of the boys' meltdowns when their routine changes. I'm pretty sure, if I'd had today's medical standards when I was a kid, I would have been diagnosed in the autism spectrum too. They had to get it from somewhere, right?

I did get HR Guy to apologize for not telling me and to promise better communication, to let me know when we've got new hires or internal transfers - though I'll believe it when I see it. He's just not detail-oriented the way his (laid off) assistant was, or that I am, so he just misses a lot of the little things. It'll just take time for both of us to get used to the new routine.

I didn't tell him I already had the paychecks ready to go, they came in yesterday so I finished that before I left. But somehow, even though I knew it wasn't actually an issue this time, I just couldn't let it slide by. I guess the core issue behind the meltdown was just that I'm sick of feeling left out, always being the last to know anything even when it affects my job directly. It feels like being forgotten, like I'm not worth remembering.
 
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Comments

 
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From:roina_arwen
Date:March 26th, 2009 04:59 pm (UTC)
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*Hugs*

At least one of you is on the ball!
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From:scubagrrl
Date:March 26th, 2009 05:53 pm (UTC)
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I don't think it's unreasonable at all to want to know about those things that affect your job. New hires, firings, transfers, or even when people need their checks to be ready early, like for the awards thing. You *do* need to know those things, though most companies seem to have a problem actually getting people notified (my honey, who runs the IT department, has the same problems getting notified of new hires).

As far as autism, you can use the coping suggestions if they help you, whether you are or are not diagnosed. It doesn't matter so much if you're directly diagnosed, since you already know what to look for.
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From:colorwhirl
Date:March 26th, 2009 08:45 pm (UTC)
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As far as autism, you can use the coping suggestions if they help you, whether you are or are not diagnosed. It doesn't matter so much if you're directly diagnosed, since you already know what to look for.

Adults can be diagnosed, too.
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From:gavinfox
Date:March 27th, 2009 04:21 am (UTC)
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And I even know a specialist in adult diagnoses in her area. He is who diagnosed me...
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From:scubagrrl
Date:March 29th, 2009 11:51 pm (UTC)
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Can be, yes. But don't need to be.

Diagnosis is helpful if one needs medication (I have a friend diagnosed as an adult with ADD, and she gets Ritalin) or to get help from the various foundations. But one doesn't need to specifically be diagnosed in order to work with what you know you have.
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From:colorwhirl
Date:March 30th, 2009 05:14 pm (UTC)
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Diagnosis is helpful if one needs medication (I have a friend diagnosed as an adult with ADD, and she gets Ritalin) or to get help from the various foundations. But one doesn't need to specifically be diagnosed in order to work with what you know you have.

Having a formal diagnosis helps one get accommodation in the work place, as well. If there is a reason for HR to actually treat an employee a certain way, having a diagnosis on the books is the only way to get that. Self-diagnosis doesn't count.
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From:scubagrrl
Date:March 30th, 2009 05:33 pm (UTC)
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True. I was thinking mostly about the personal level.
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From:starfallz
Date:March 26th, 2009 09:00 pm (UTC)
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I sometimes wonder if my difficulty with dealing with schedule changes is some shade of autism as well. I get pretty wrought over schedules some times.
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From:knightaudit
Date:March 26th, 2009 11:41 pm (UTC)
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I gave up on him a few months ago. He has ideas about what goes on with my job that have no basis in reality what-so-ever. I'm right there with you on the frustration and stress.
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From:gavinfox
Date:March 27th, 2009 04:20 am (UTC)
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I always was wondering if you and your husband might be a liiittllee bit aspie. You seem to have the social cues down better than me, for the most part, but some of the other behaviors (anxiety and such) seem to be a bit more prominant. Asperger's goes with social anxiety / sensory integration / adhd / tons of stuff... I find joining some aspie livejournal communities helps a LOT with figuring out what is a common experience!

Star Songs